Day 2- fatigue

I was actually happily surprised that I got as much sleep as I did last night without the Seroquel.  I was able to sleep roughly three hours when I was expecting none.  Still not enough to feel very functional during the day, but I hope I can eventually build up the hours I am able to sleep during the night.  I awoke around 7 AM and promptly showered and put on my light-therapy visor which features a 10,000 lux light pointing directly into your pupils to try to loudly tell your brain "HEY!  It's DAYTIME.  Start making those circadian rhythm proteins."  I have felt like napping during the day, but where I work there is no means or opportunity, which is probably for the best when trying to establish a rhythm.

In the mornings I would normally take three drugs: Levothyroxine, Inderal and Provigil.  Provigil is a stimulant normally used for shift-workers experiencing fatigue or people with narcolepsy, but a study came out not too long ago suggesting it works well for bipolar depression (bipolar depression is notoriously hard to treat because typical antidepressants usually should be avoided).  Levothyroxine is a synthetic thyroid hormone.  I do not have hypothyroidism, but this was another "last resort" medication my doctor prescribed to help lull me out of my depression and fatigue.  Lastly, Inderal is a beta-blocker, normally used for high blood pressure, but it works magic for my migraines.

Of those three drugs, only one of them appears to work how it should and that is the Inderal.  Provigil worked splendidly at first.  I had energy, motivation, focus.  I would come into work feeling alert and happy.  But like most good things, the effects have faded nearly to oblivion.  Funny that I have been on an anti-narcolepsy drug, yet feel as if I could fall asleep at any time.  The Levothyroxine, which I have taken for about three weeks, doesn't seem to do a damn thing and with my thyroid being already on the high side of normal, it makes me skeptical of whether it's really appropriate or safe for me to take it.

This morning I took the Inderal and skipped the others.  I was told by my doctor I didn't necessarily have to titrate off of these drugs, so I am just stopping them.  So how am I doing today...

Well, I'm f*cking tired, obviously.  Irritable, unmotivated, unhappy.  Those are pretty normal feelings for me anyway, but I can't really distinguish whether I am feeling these things because of the meds or the fatigue.  It could very well be a combination.  I don't imagine I will sort things out until I am sleeping regularly again.